False Flight

In Fiction on July 13, 2012 at 6:57 am

A couple weeks back I did a Friday Fictioneers post that ended with some ominous crows; this week, birds figure in Madison Wood’s prompt, so I thought I’d try to take it in a slightly different direction from that other one.

Enjoy! Comments and criticism are welcome.

False Flight

The birds have amassed but they remain suspicious of their prize.

Their black eyes wink like stars in the waning light. Now and then, their wings unfurl and they shake the branches with false flight, but they do not descend — not yet.

I believe they are waiting for my spirit to leave its shell, but I, too, am suspicious…and afraid. My body is a day gone now, but my soul is newly wakened.

When I take flight, I wonder, where will I go? Will I be carried by a breeze into the sky? Will I sink to the ground to rot?

Or will I quaver here until the birds have pecked me to my bones — swallowing my soul.


*****

Click that little blue guy up there for a whole list of great responses to the photo prompt.

Some of my recent Friday Fictioneers posts:

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  1. Oh yikes. I’d hate to be present in any fashion if birds were set to pick my bones clean. These carrion birds seem a bit reticent to descend. Maybe they see dead people… All the time. Nicely done.

    My attempt: http://unduecreativity.wordpress.com/2012/07/12/circling/

    • Thanks CC — lots of birds for me in the past few weeks! I’m heading to read yours now. (sorry for the late response; my internet has been spotty here).

  2. This is a good one – I liked the idea that the birds wait for the soul to depart, and that they might get tired of waiting and take the soul too! Really creepy.

    http://castelsarrasin.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/every-cloud-friday-fictioneers-july-2012/

  3. Or maybe the birds know something that his newly wakened soul doesn’t yet and they’re too scared to feast? Lots of lovely, rich descriptions again, Brian.

    I’m here: http://mysocalleddutchlife.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/canyon-ff-friday-the-13th-of-july-12/

  4. oh my.. I really hope not the last one. Another nice one Brian, great tone of voice, I like the wonder and how you did it from the corpse’s pov.

    http://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/

  5. False Flight was a great story well written. Imaginatively conceived and spookily executed. Well done.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/roadkill/

  6. This is fine evocative piece, almost poetic in presentation. Well done. Mine is here and linked as well: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/07/13/fridayfictioneers-spectators/

  7. Intense emotions here, made my stomach tighten. Good read!

  8. A great story Brian.
    A chilling, unnerving feel to it – wondering if there was a place for the soul to go to or whether it would just end up as another dish for the waiting birds.

  9. An interesting philosophical interpretation, beyond the grave, the nightmare of many – wonderful depiction, very convincing.
    http://wp.me/s1nUrn-buzzard

  10. Very well done, the soul not flown and waiting for the murder of crows to get to work. EEP. I’m old enough it reminds me of the better Night Gallery offerings, or something you’d hear as a late night radio play.

  11. Will he feel eat pull and tear as his flesh is stripped away and eaten? Is that the beginning of hell?

  12. It’s a waiting game. The main character ponders over issues that most people fear to broach. Where will my soul go after I die?

    http://logo-ligi.com/2012/07/12/soliloquy-of-a-disgruntled-raven/

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