He spun as he fell, his vision a strobe of dark and light: earthy, textured and shadowed below; bright, blue and smooth above. Except for the blimp, of course, slowly shrinking.
Have a few brews, they said.
Enter the contest, they said.
View of a lifetime, they said!
Well, it had been beautiful. But whose idea was it to stick a bunch of drunks in a tiny room suspended at fifteen hundred feet?
Frankly, it just seemed silly now.
He fell, wondering which of those fat bastards had bumped him — wondering what he’d see when his life finally flashed.
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This story is my response Madison Woods’ Friday Fictioneers prompt (the picture is the prompt). Check out the other stories (including Madison’s) and submit your own on the story page!
Feedback and other stories welcome below! Please feel free to check out some of my other fiction — I love constructive criticism!
Dear Brian,
11.2 seconds was wonderful flash on flash. I really enhjoyed your take on the prompt, especially the description of his view while falling. Well done.
Aloha,
Doug
http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/joining-a-murmuration-or-bud-cowarts-view/
Thanks Doug – I really liked the view of history you took with your story. Til next week!
This was terrific! Very visceral and the images were amazing. See, this is why you shouldn’t get drunk in high places! Well done! Here’s my take: http://theforgottenwife.com/2012/06/07/friday-fictioneers-6812/
Glad you liked it. I thought yours this week was one of your best
A fine take on the prompt. I couldn’t believe they had been so foolhardy. Or they couldn’t resist the fun and thrill! Too bad. Mine is here: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/fridayfictioneers-emily/
Thanks! I went pretty literal with it, obviously. I liked your more figurative interpretation.
Wow, well written Brian, liked how you arranged and crafted this…good one!
http://writersclubkl.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/friday-fictioneer-spread-your-wings-and-fly/
Thank you thank you — I appreciate that! I’m never as sure of myself on the prompts with more modern photos (I didn’t even do the MacDonalds one, but then again I was on vacation haha)
Nicely done and a great comment on how a bunch of drunks are a bad idea in the air or on the ground.
Glad you liked it Carlos. The cultural take you have in yours is really interesting (and believable). Another good Friday!
Oops, mine is at: http://repuestodelatabla.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/friday-fictioneer-100-word-story-airship/
Oh wow. Perfect, especially when you realize what 11.2 seconds is referring to!
Thanks! Ha, that number is thanks to careful calculation, so I’m glad it worked (thank you high school physics class)
I like the jumpy nature of your narrative here, Brian. Totally seems like the way your brain would work if you were falling and I enjoyed how he was resentful rather than fearful.
I’m over here:
http://elmowrites.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/friday-fiction-blimps-and-balloons/
Thanks – I tried to keep it lighter, haha, and yet there’s still a man falling to his death. Thanks for reading!
nicely done! 🙂
Great flow in the thought process. I bet it was a reality TV show that came up with this stunt.
Kathy
http://notforallmarkets.wordpress.com/2012/06/08/on-the-bright-side/
Talk about thought process! The disjointed, funny take you have in your story was priceless. Really great job. Thanks for reading!
Oh my….my fear of heights just got worse, thanks to you.
Ack!
http://erinleary.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/flash-friday-fiction-4/
Hmm, glad I could help? Just no drunken blimp rides, that’s all! Haha, thanks for reading.
Sounds like he didn’t think it through. He’ll soon be playing a harp with a halo on his head.
Mine is here: http://logo-ligi.com/2012/06/08/radiant-flight/
Don’t drink and fly.
Warning: Choose your drinking buddies carefully. Here’s mine:
http://www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com
Whooooo, that left me with chills–well written, made my hair prickle on the back of my neck. Ever wake up from one of those dreams where you fall, and fall, and…? Well done!
Thanks for commenting on mine.
Fine friends he’s got! This was very realistic, especially the description of what he saw when falling, I could almost have been there. Nice work.
he’s got great poise for the moment. did you do the math and work out 11.2 seconds x 32 ft/sec-squared?
He does haha, and I did indeed – but he hits terminal velocity after about 5.7, so from there it’s just distance divided by speed. Glad someone finally asked about the math! Ha
No chute? No bungee? No inflatable raft? He’s doomed!
http://thebradleychronicles.wordpress.com/2012/06/07/flash-fiction-friday-the-gospel/#comment-744
Maths was never my strong point but I take it that it all worked out to show that once you are hitting that terminal velocity you are dead before you get a chance to really have your chance to see your life flash before your eyes. So was it deliberate? 🙂
Whoa! Pretty cruel take on the prompt, but really well done, from the title to the final flash. Very good use of language, very visual, and very descriptive.
Lindaura,
who can be found here, at: http://fictionvictimtoo.blogspot.com
11.2 seconds probably seemed an eternity. I liked his query “…….wondering what he would see when his life finally flashed.” A very good take on the prompt!
Great falling description. I cringe to think of the sudden stop at the end.
Here’s mine: http://www.rochelle-wisoff.blogspot.com/2012/06/wings.html