Five Sentence Fiction: In search of spoils

In Fiction on May 21, 2012 at 1:50 pm

The fog crept across the plain, wispy and wavering like a line of ghostly scavengers stooping low to inspect the dead. Caleb felt the dew it had deposited on his eyelids – cold, liquid coins — and awoke, sorely disappointed to find that he was still alive.

He sat up and peered through the mist. A few yards distant, the white shroud was wrapping some fortunate soul in its folds, hiding from view the open eyes and slackened mouth and hollow cheeks, making dark shapes of the bodies that lay farther afield in the grassy muck.

Theirs is the glory of war, he thought bitterly as he got to his feet, and now the task is mine alone.

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Five Sentence FictionThis is my response to Lillie McFerrin’s Five Sentence Fiction prompt. This week’s prompt: FOGGY. Check out the other responses on her blog!

Constructive criticism, destructive praise, and general commentary welcome below.

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  1. I love your five-sentence fiction. And I think you are creative! So I nominated you for a Creative Blogger award. 🙂 Check it out: http://lauraleeanderson.wordpress.com/2012/05/21/im-a-blooge/

    • Thank you kindly! It’s my first, so I’ll have to take a look at these here directions. I’m glad to know someone out there likes my stuff!

  2. Wow. “Cold liquid coins” loved it. Beautifully melancholy. very nice work.

  3. Enjoyed this, some lovely images created here

  4. So happy to have you join FSF!! The details are perfect in each sentence. That first sentence, though, was my favorite; full of amazingly creative imagery. Awesome job 🙂

  5. Loving the coins. What an ancient image. Think I’ll be a regular here…

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